" The priest looks at the bottle and says "Good Lord! " -- The wife and I were sitting around the breakfast table one lazy Sunday morning.
" -- A nun is sitting on a train opposite a Muslim man who is eating prawns.
-- When in India recently I saw a sign that said 'English speaking taxi driver'. She looked at me and said "What makes you think I'd marry another wanker?-In Nashville, they tell of Fred 'Junior' Williams, the burglar who fell asleep on the sofa of the home he was robbing, only to be awakened by police.-In Rhode Island, cops were sure they had the right guy when the suspect in a string of coin-machine thefts paid his 0 bail entirely in quarters. ' -- My girlfriend I walked past a swanky new restaurant last night. The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car. "Now why would you want me to do something like that? "I figure that you would eventually remarry and I don't want some other wanker using my stuff". Being the nice fellow I am, I thought: "Bugger it, I'll treat her! -- An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut. I said to her "If I were to die suddenly, I want you to immediately sell all my stuff".-A defendant facing drug possession charges on trial in Pontiac, Michigan, said he had been searched without a warrant.